And finally I'm about to be laid!

Monday, September 19, 2005

Shedding the desi skin...

A matchmaking dot com site finally made me shed my desi skin and become more "Americanized". I signed up as a free member and soon was inundated with requests to talk to people - made me feel rather good, I have to admit. After talking to some really weird people - like the one who said in the first coversation in a thick south-Indian accent "Come to me babby..I will sow (sic) you haven (sic)"- I got smarter and used filters and blocks to get to the nice men out there...Indian men...as I was still unsure about dating an American guy. It was (and is) still out of my comfort zone to date a "real" (read white and blond) American.

One guy I met asked me out to dinner...and it turned out really nice. We met up at a street corner, he was wearing a faded white T Shirt and blue jeans and had a 5 o clock shadow on his chin and a smile on his face. I was probably a bit over dressed in my sexy black top but I was wearing jeans too and we had cocktails with shrimp at a restaurant by the river side. Then we walked around the quaint "old city" streets till we were tired and realized we wanted dinner.

We ate tacos at a Mexican joint with some margaritas and by the time we left it felt completely natural to hold hands and stroll down the riverside though it was a first date. Some days later with long conversations over phone in the night we met again - and this time we kissed. His mouth felt warm and nice. I'd forgotten what it had been like to be kissed...it felt really good. Why hadn't I done this ages ago I thought...well I could rectify that, starting now! So I came back home walking on clouds and the smile on my face would not go away. I knew I did not want any thing long term with this guy as he simply wasn't my type and we were headed in different directions in our careers - even in different cities. But for now, I just wanted to enjoy the moment.

And moments they were....he had bought a new house which he wanted me to see - it was out in the country and I went out there on a train. He was standing in the sunset at the train station and when I came down the rickety wooden stairs from the quaint station we just held hands and smiled. Yet again I wondered how it was that I could feel so comfortable with a guy I was only meeting the 3rd time. But it was a great feeling to be attracted to someone and know they were feeling the same way too. His house was beautiful - white walls and glass windows everywhere and so spic and span and new...he was comfortable in the kitchen and had made some 'dal' and rice for me...but first of course we sat down with some wine. He turned on the TV, we kicked off our shoes...the plan was I would go home after dinner....so we watched TV he slipped an arm around me and we just watched the screen for a while...I forgot to watch it some time later...as something more was creeping up...I wanted him to kiss me - oh so badly - and was afraid to start it as he would think I was too bold. But soon he obliged and for a fleeting moment I was elated and then I wanted more...for him to kiss me deeper. He had unknowingly awakened something that had been kept at bay for 6 long years...I wanted him to really kiss me now. Tongue playing with tongue - just holding each other tight and kissing till we gasped for breath. I think I was a little surprised by my passion...I had not think I was this starved..but oh I responded like a woman who has not eaten for days and sees food! --Contd.



-------------------- Tuesday, March 15, 2005
The Naked Boss

My boss goes naked every Friday, for world peace she says.

So every Friday, she strips down to nothing and take a picture of herself which she posts on her blog. The logic? If we are all naked we would not care so much about the physical aspects of each one of us and then we would stop hating ourselves and each other and that would kill our urge for strife and slowly the world would move towards peace.....A bit convoluted I say and maybe ambitious. But so like her, utterly her to do this.

She changes the color of her hair too every month, sometimes its a bright shocking blue, sometimes fuschia and then even yellow and blonde. Last I looked it was black and now its Red...I would not even begin to predict what the next color will be or what her real hair color ever was...I just wait for the next rainbow hue to appear.

The company recently fired her though because she stripped down to nothing in the supplies room and then put out pictures on the internet blog. The firm is a tech firm and this was a little too much for them, especially as she started writing about the server crashes in her blog! So now she left with her husband...and the whimsy she lent to the office is gone. It's become a sedate place again, though before she went she did convince a few people to strip along with her.

Last year she and her husand repeated their marriage vows on the beach, it was picture pretty like her wedding where she dressed everyone like fairies (just to clarify - I mean the real fairies that fly about and not the 'merry' fairy which it means nowadays), so she had wings and a white dress and her husband wore white too. Only this time on the beach the fairy prince and princess were naked. Stark naked against the golden sands without a shred of clothing. As the guests watched (clothed) the couple exchanged vows and ran naked into the sea. Some one captured them from behind, the lean muscled groom and the dimpled bride running bare-assed into the sea. Such a pretty picture it was - naughty and romantic.

She used to keep on her table. It often caused the people to remark..."Oh! so sometimes you wear clothes too!,," She left the office but I wish her well, maybe the world does need gypsies like her...Who knows?


Cast Creed and Religion and the TTM factor

So this is going to be my bigoted piece. Totally politically incorrect. Read further only if you wish to read my very 'colored' opinions.


I came to the US with an open mind but once here I have heard so much about diversity and the differences in people that now I am much more biased. My eyes have been opened to racism between the white and blacks, the religious differences between the Jewish and Christians, the turbulence between the so called 'Asians' Koreans Vs. Chinese Vs. Japanese. The difference between cultures of people from Hong Kong, Singapore and Shanghai.....the Hispanic ethos and the American Indians (who we still call 'Red Indians' in India, virtually an insult here) and last but not the least the different types of 'East Indians'. So there are Desis and Pakistanis and Bangladeshi and Srilankans all rolled into East Indians.

And contrary to the sentiment in India, the boundary lines are still the same in the U.S. ...except they are not so explicitly stated. I don't see the Hindu-Muslim Bhai Bhai spirit here any more than India. And within the Desis of course there is what I call the TTM factor personally - Telegu, Tamil and Mallu factor - there are many exceptions but the typical breed of TTMs (apologies to anyone who thinks this clubbing together is mistaken, but this is my piece!) are the software engineers who are 5:1 or 7:1, the ratio of people to houses esp in areas like New Jersey. When I put up my profile on Shaadi, little did I think that I will come across so many similar people....all most of them wanted to do after the first couple of conversations was to have cheap phone sex...It would start in a typical manner in their guttural accents..."Do you waaant to go outt with me babbby? I weel geeve youu haaven...Once I tried to go further and try the phone sex bit but the distaste and/or laughter overcame me and I could not continue....So after many such misses, I am trying to now avoid the TTM factor, I figure I can take on the GPM (Gujju/Punju/Marathi) factor now, and maybe something better will result...my fingers are crossed....Posted by Desi Gal on 02:01 AM


The dot com Shaadi...?

So I am trying out shaadi.com on a friend's recommendation who said he had met many 'great' women through it.

I put up my profile - Looking for a nice, decent Indian guy who can steal my heart ....who is a good friend and a husband...etc. etc. and waited for this mythical man to appear in my inbox.

So I get a call from a guy from Gujarat who has settled in the US. After we speak for a while I start thinking that he is pretty good when he drops the bombshell that he is divorced, his wife left him but not for a guy but a girl! Wow! I think, Indian women are surely starting to explore their sexuality...so we keep talking...and soon he starts asking me questions which seem weird to me. Like do I like looking at women, would I mind being touched by a woman etc...and I go Hey! Buddy, I am not what you are thinking....believe me I would know!!! So he stops but the next few times whenever we talk he picks up the same thread...Are you into women...till it begins to get on my nerves....So I keep steering the topic to nicer things but sure enough he is not interested.

So I do the only thing there is to do - Say a polite Goodbye to him. I almost want to say goodbye to the idea of a dot com Shaadi but I think...What the heck...let's keep trying...maybe that someone is out there!Posted by Desi Gal on 01:38 AM